The Year of Living Biblically

[Trueblue]

At the beginning of the year, I wrote down every rule, every guideline, every suggestion, every nugget of advice I could find in the Bible. It's a very long list. It runs 72 pages. More than 700 rules.

Has anybody read this book? It sounds good.

http://www.ajjacobs.com/books/yolb.asp?id=rules

[sparks]

MOST DIFFICULT TO FOLLOW
You shall not trim the corners of your beard (Leviticus 19:27) My rabbinical beard became wildly uncomfortable, plus I was subjected to every beard joke in the history of facial hair, with about 412 ZZ Top references.


You should not lie on a bed where a mensturating woman has lain, and you can't sit on a chair where she has sat (Leviticus 15:20). That knocks out all subways and restaurants. See the Handy Seat section for my attempt to follow this.


You shall smash idols. The ban on idolatry is such a huge part of the Bible, I figured I should try to smash something. I ended up smashing my wife's fake Oscar statuette. But it felt like a hollow gesture, and it annoyed my wife by getting gold flakes all over the rug.


Put to death men and women who commit adultery. Though I did manage to figure out a way to stone adulterers. One adulterer in particular. A grumpy seventysomething man I met in the park. I used pebbles.


RULES VIOLATED AT LEAST ONE TIME PER DAY

You shall not covet. This is like asking someone not to breathe. Especially in New York. New York is a city that runs on coveting. On a typical day, I covet everything from Jonathan Safran Foer's speaking fee (allegedly $15,000) to our friend's sprawling backyard in the suburbs.


You shall not lie. Once I started keeping track, the number of lies was astounding. I lie to everyone - strangers, my wife, my three-year-old son ("No, we can't watch TV. It's broken.")


You shall stand in the presence of the elderly. I did try to follow this at certain points in my journey. Like the time I ate dinner in a Florida restaurant at 5 p.m. That was the highest concentration of elderly people in America. So I stood up from my chair every time a white-haired person entered the room, which meant I was bouncing up and down like a pogo stick.


You shall not utter the name of another God. English is filled with the names of pagan gods - even the days of the week are named for them: Thursday, for the Norse god of thunder Thor.


Be slow to anger (Proverbs 19:11). My anger isn't of the shouting, pulsing, vein-in-the-forehead variety. It's more of long-lasting resentment. I never fully got it under control, but the best method for putting the brakes on my anger came from the story of Jonah. (See the book for details)

LOL! LOL! LOL! I can imagine this guy had a rough time of it! :lol

The do not sit or lay down where a woman menstrated would be a real toughy! :rofl

[Trueblue]

LOL! LOL! LOL! I can imagine this guy had a rough time of it! :lol

The do not sit or lay down where a woman menstrated would be a real toughy! :rofl

I heard an interview with him yesterday. His wife found that dictate to be rather sexist, so she went around and sat in every chair in the house. He said that he spent a lot of the year standing. :rofl

[sparks]

I heard an interview with him yesterday. His wife found that dictate to be rather sexist, so she went around and sat in every chair in the house. He said that he spent a lot of the year standing. :rofl

So...I guess staying at a hotel was out of the question for him? :rofl

[Trueblue]

So...I guess staying at a hotel was out of the question for him? :rofl

Sounds like it to me!

[sparks]

Sounds like it to me!

Guess he had to get himself a brand new little roll away bed to sleep in? :rofl

And I suppose he gave up sleeping with his wife too? :rofl

[Trueblue]

Guess he had to get himself a brand new little roll away bed to sleep in? :rofl

And I suppose he gave up sleeping with his wife too? :rofl

I think that orthodox Jews get a separate bed for their wives to use at the "appropriate" time.

Sounds like this lady might not have cooperated, though. :lol

[Saguaro]

If it were not for menstration, the human race would have died out long ago ! Or is this where they get keep women pregnant and barefoot ?

[sparks]

If it were not for menstration, the human race would have died out long ago ! Or is this where they get keep women pregnant and barefoot ?

Well...the getting kicked out of bed would be less...until she delivers...then it's six weeks in the freakin' roll away bed! :rofl

[Saguaro]

The roll away is too good for them :D

[Kurtz]

Has anybody read this book? It sounds good.

http://www.ajjacobs.com/books/yolb.asp?id=rules

TB, I remember last year after I had to wrap those 25 DVDs for my brother when you told me they make Christmas paper sleeves for those thangs 'n I said NOW ya tell me. :lol

Thanks for postin' this book at this time, I know what I'm gonna get a coupla my Christian friends for Christmas now and it's JUST IN TIME, NOT TOO LATE! :lmao

[Trueblue]

TB, I remember last year after I had to wrap those 25 DVDs for my brother when you told me they make Christmas paper sleeves for those thangs 'n I said NOW ya tell me. :lol

Thanks for postin' this book at this time, I know what I'm gonna get a coupla my Christian friends for Christmas now and it's JUST IN TIME, NOT TOO LATE! :lmao

I'm always striving to improve!!!!

[Izdaari]

The whole exercise strikes me as rather silly: The law is the Old Covenant. Under the New Covenant, salvation comes not through the law but by grace though faith, not earned but as a free gift from God.


Ephesians 2:8-9 (New King James Version)

8 For by grace you have been saved through faith, and that not of yourselves; it is the gift of God, 9 not of works, lest anyone should boast.

[Trueblue]

The whole exercise strikes me as rather silly: The law is the Old Covenant. Under the New Covenant, salvation comes not through the law but by grace though faith, not earned but as a free gift from God.


Ephesians 2:8-9 (New King James Version)

8 For by grace you have been saved through faith, and that not of yourselves; it is the gift of God, 9 not of works, lest anyone should boast.

Of course, this is contradicted by Jesus' saying that he came to fulfill the law.

And btw, the man who did this is of Jewish heritage. He didn't try to live under the dictates of the NT.