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Zanoog
07-15-2007, 09:36 AM
MOTHER LEARNS LATE IN LIFE TO ACCEPT GAY SON AS HE IS

DEAR ABBY: My husband and I raised our two sons and two daughters. One son and both daughters married well. Our other son, "Neil," is gay. He and his partner, "Ron," have been together 15 years, but Neil's father and I never wanted to know Ron because we disapproved of their lifestyle.
When I was 74, my husband died, leaving me in ill health and nearly penniless. No longer able to live alone, I asked my married son and two daughters if I could "visit" each of them for four months a year. (I didn't want to burden any one family, and thought living out of a suitcase would be best for everyone.) All three turned me down. Feeling unwanted, I wanted to die.

When Neil and Ron heard what had happened, they invited me to move across country and live with them. They welcomed me into their home, and even removed a wall between two rooms so I'd have a bedroom with a private bath and sitting room -- although we spend most of our time together.

They also include me in many of their plans. Since I moved in with them, I have traveled more than I have my whole life and seen places I only read about in books. They never mention the fact that they are supporting me, or that I ignored them in the past.

When old friends ask how it feels living with my gay son, I tell them I hope they're lucky enough to have one who will take them in one day. Please continue urging your readers to accept their children as they are. My only regret is that I wasted 15 years. -- GRATEFUL MOM

http://www.uexpress.com/dearabby/?uc_full_date=20070713

Cookie Parker
07-15-2007, 09:58 AM
I wonder if the Christian religion of "love" kept this mother and her gay son apart for so long. IN the 1960's and 1970's, Judge not lest yea be judged was the emphasis of Christianity

Oceanbreeze
07-15-2007, 12:40 PM
Kudos to the son and mom for making up for lost time. Shame on her other children. :thumb

Incognito
07-15-2007, 12:47 PM
I read this in the paper on Friday. :yep

It's just sad that it took the mom that long to accept it.

Deadshot
07-15-2007, 01:02 PM
It is sad and touching...but one would have to wonder about the character of the mother.

Three kids abandon her and the one she shit on takes her back. It's the Prodigal son in reverse.

Zanoog
07-15-2007, 01:41 PM
:newmom L&L what do you mean?

AnnEsthesia
07-15-2007, 02:37 PM
He is ranting that the only 'real' people are those who are homophobic. And anyone who is not homophobic is brainwashed and hence, unreal.

Zanoog
07-15-2007, 05:33 PM
He is ranting that the only 'real' people are those who are homophobic. And anyone who is not homophobic is brainwashed and hence, unreal.

Oh. Thank you for clearing that up for me! I looked at the link, it didn't make sense. Now it does.

quiet man
07-15-2007, 06:23 PM
the children who chose not to share living with mom are the real losers. they deemed their lives would be too important to handle their mom living there for a few months at a time. their children also lose because grandma is spending time with some one else and not them. so sad and selfish. thanks to her gay son and his partner her life is livable again and she is enjoying it.

AnnEsthesia
07-15-2007, 06:29 PM
I guess it just proves the old adage that those who have experienced something have more sympathy for someone going through the same thing. I am sure Neil felt abandoned by his family when they refused to acknowledge him and his partner and so when his mom was in the same situation, he was able to open his heart.

Of course, it also goes to show that you reap what you show. They taught their children to not feel sympathy, so when she needed it from her children, they were unable to do so.

sparks
07-15-2007, 07:19 PM
There is healing in this situation on so many levels. Not only has the Mom come to accept the gay son's life choices but I'm sure the gay son has experienced the coming full circle with his Mom as well.

Sometimes we just never know what the stars have in store for us. I always love a story of reconciliation. :heart

Saguaro
07-15-2007, 07:38 PM
Being closed minded takes away so much in life.